Hair and Makeup

Hair and makeup artists will get you ready by the time specified. Trouble is, you need to be ready well and truly before you leave for the service. Too many times I have arrived at a bridal preparation and sat for nearly an hour. We do not expect you to be completely ready, but close to would be nice. Simply tell them you want to be ready an hour earlier than your departure time.

Groom's arrival at church

Traditionally, the bride and groom enter by separate doors and leave by the same one.

Bride's arrival at church

The bride arrives with her veil back. This is good for two reasons. 1/ It allows for video and photography to happen outside the church without the veil obscuring the bride's face. 2/ (and this is the traditional part) Dad, or whoever is walking the bride down the aisle, has the task of covering the bride's face with the veil. This is a very romantic shot. I hate seeing drivers do this. I don't mind the bridesmaids or mum doing it though. Dad will need to be told to only lift the top part of the veil.

First kiss

Out of all the events that happen on the day, this is the one that most often doesn't happen as it should. It all comes about through lack of planning. Firstly, often the groom does not realise that the veil is attached at the back of the bride's head. This usually results on the veil being plonked onto the bride's head. Not a very romantic shot. The groom needs to be informed of the correct way of lifting the veil (up and over). This leads to the next problem. As the groom cannot see behind the bride, it is easy for the veil to not fall correctly. This is where the bride must arrange with her lead attendant to be ready to straighten her veil when it is over her head. If there is more than one attendant, it is best for the bride's bouquet to be passed to the next attendant to allow the first one to have a hand free to do this. Once the kiss has happened, it is important for the bride to resist the temptation to clean the groom's lips of lipstick (where he would give the naughty boy pose) and fix them just before the signing.

Outside the Church

The time after the wedding is often not taken into account. You do not simply walk out of the ceremony and drive away in your cars. People want to congratulate you. Also, this is the time a lot of family snaps are taken. On average, the time spent between walking out of the ceremony and driving off is 25 minutes.

Formal Photos

Allow yourself enough time to get your photo shoot completed without rushing. It is no good arriving at the location with the sun already setting. Remember that your formal cars will not be driven as quickly as you might, so it will take longer to get anywhere. I had a couple who married at Darook Park in Cronulla, and only allowed 30 minutes each way to get to The Rocks for their photo shoot. It took an hour each way.

Arrival at Reception

There is generally a 30 minute gap from when your guests arrive at the reception as to when the bridal party arrives. Even then, you are normally given time to freshen up before your grand entrance.

Master of Ceremonies

Be careful choosing an MC. Many reception venues have an MC as part of the package or a DJ who can do it. It is a big responsibility to give to a family member or friend. I have seen many receptions become disorganised without the right person. It is well worth it to get a professional.

Formal Introduction

It is important that your bridal party is aware of where they have to go upon entering the room. It is easy to become disorientated if the bridal table is not immediately seen. Your MC should discuss with you how you enter. The best way for all your friends and family to see you (including your video producer and still photographer) is to have everyone seated. If you are going to do it this way, it is important for your MC to notify your guests of this or people will start standing.

Table Decorations

Tall, bulky table decoration may look nice but make it hard for your guests to see each other and talk to one another.

Positioning of Dance Floor

The preferred spot for the dance floor is directly in front of the bridal table. This allows all your guests to see you and allows your camera people close access.

Meals

Most reception houses prefer that the meals are served in order before the speeches. Sometimes couples decide to have the speeches as soon as they enter. This can cause problems as the kitchen won't know when to have the meals ready by.

Speeches

Most people write into their speeches toasts that ask for everyone to be upstanding. Like the formal introduction, this actually stops people from seeing you. The modern way to do it is for the people receiving the toast to stand. Again, your MC needs to be informed to let your guests know.

Toasting Each Other

Another one of those times where a little thought beforehand can save problems. The crossing of arms can look quite disorganised, especially when couples try to make allowances for height differences. The easiest way to do it is to face each other with your drinks in your right hands. Then it is simply a case of linking wrists and drinking.

First Dance

Traditionally you start and end the first dance with each other. Remember that parents will want to cut in to dance with their "babies." If you want to follow tradition just politely mention to them prior to the day that that is what you want to do and ask to dance with them during the second song. It is also up to you if you want to dance by yourselves for the first song. Mention to your MC as to when you want the rest of the bridal party and parents to be invited onto the dance floor.

Leaving

There are several ways to leave. Most people do the bouquet/garter and then either leave through a guard of honour or have a circle. You will need to allow yourself 25 to 30 minutes to do this properly. A simpler less time consuming method, borrowed from some ethnic cultures, is to say goodbye to only the parents and bridal party. This cuts down the leaving time to 5 to 15 minutes. It really is a matter of personal taste.

There you have it. As I said in the beginning, do your wedding as YOU want to. All I have done is relate how some things can go wrong without sufficient planning. Do not allow things to bug you too much on your day. It is too important a day to let something get under your skin. I reminded a groom of this recently when a service provider didn't come through as requested. I reminded him the most important thing was that he had married and was with the one he loved. Retribution with the company could wait till Monday.